


Child's Play

by trustingHim17



Category: Sherlock Holmes - Arthur Conan Doyle
Genre: Bored Sherlock Holmes, Fluff and Humor, Fun, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:02:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25325098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trustingHim17/pseuds/trustingHim17
Summary: Holmes is bored. How does Watson solve this problem?
Kudos: 15





	Child's Play

The sun shone brightly through the windows, and I longed to be out in it. It seemed like ages since London had boasted such a gorgeous day, but I was trapped inside, more concerned with what Holmes would do if I left than my desire to enjoy the beautiful day.

My friend paced in front of the hearth, smoking like a chimney. After a dearth of cases for the last fortnight, he had run out of stuff to do, and I was looking for anything to keep him occupied.

Just because he had told me before that I need not occupy him did not mean that I would quit trying. A bored Holmes was a tempted Holmes, and I would do anything to prevent that.

“Why don’t you finish that experiment you were working on last week?”

Holmes flicked a hand, brushing the idea aside and never stopping his pacing. “The case is long solved, and the guilty one is behind bars. It no longer matters.”

“Your commonplace books, then. You have not gone through the most recent magazines to update your books, yet.”

“No need,” came the reply from the cloud of smoke. “There was nothing in them that was not already published in a previous edition.”

I frowned, waving away the smoke that drifted towards me as I tried to think. Most of my simpler fallback plans for occupying Holmes had been used recently, and there was no way I would be able to use them again so soon. I looked around, trying to gain inspiration from something around me.

Young voices carried up from the street, and I stood, curious. Several Irregulars ran around outside, and I realized they were playing a game when I saw one crawl inside a trash can down the street. Another climbed a tree, and I smiled.

“We could always join the Irregulars,” I told Holmes.

He broke off his pacing, joining me at the window to see to what I was referring. It took all of two seconds for him to spot the young boy hiding in a tree, and he scowled at me.

“I am not joining a child’s game.” He stalked back to the fireplace and resumed pacing, looking so much like an irate stork that I nearly laughed aloud.

I settled on a smirk. “You just know I would lose you in this city,” I baited him.

He released an irritated snort, his pride demanding he answer. “I could find you without a problem. I simply see no reason to play a child’s game.”

“So the Irregulars are better than you?”

He spun around to face me, his response immediate, almost instinctive. “Of course, not!”

“Then you should be able to find me easily,” I returned, desperately hoping he would not immediately recall another time he had tried to track me through the streets of London.

An irritated huff was his only reply, and I knew I had him pinned. A grin spread across my face that I made no attempt to hide.

“Terms of engagement?” he asked, scowling at my grin.

I thought about that for a moment, weighing time frames.

“Thirty-minute head start,” I decided, trying to give myself enough time to account for his quicker pace and longer stride. “You have three hours to catch me. Meet back here in four hours if you do not find me in time. Loser buys supper.”

Holmes harrumphed at me but made no reply, and I stood. “Back in a moment.”

I made my way up the stairs to my room, where I used the noise of grabbing my pocket watch from the desk to set up an aid before descending back to the sitting room.

After making sure my pocket watch matched the time on the mantle clock, I looked over to see Holmes watching me, irritation warring with interest in his gaze.

“Quarter to two,” I announced and turned for the stairs, grinning that I had actually caught his interest, for all that he would deny it. We had not done something quite like this before, and he would treat it as a case. I would have to move quickly if I wanted to occupy him for the full three hours.

I stood in front of the door for the briefest moment, debating which way to turn, before deciding to go right. I quickly lost myself in the crowd to make it difficult for Holmes to spot me from the window. A block out of sight of the flat, I began brushing against the buildings occasionally, walking along the softer edge, and leaning heavily on my stick. I was careful to do each for only a few steps before I moved back to the middle of the path, where the passing of so many other people would muddle my trail.

Five blocks out of sight, I started watching faces, looking for a small one I recognized as I kept moving quickly. Just before I was ready to change streets, I caught sight of one of the Irregulars, and I stepped out of the crowd of Londoners.

“Timothy!” I called just loudly enough to carry. The young boy came over with a scowl, and I belatedly remembered what he had asked us the month before. “Tim,” I corrected myself. “Sorry. It will take me a while to remember.” The scowl faded as he came closer, keeping pace with me as I made my way down the street. “Do you and one other want to help me prank Holmes?” I asked.

A grin split the boy’s face. “Do ya really gotta ask that, Doctor? A’course we wanna help!”

I turned a corner, leaving Baker Street for a smaller side road as I nodded and looked around, checking my progress. This would take perfect timing to pull off. “Good. Bring back the first one you find. I need to keep moving, so hurry! I intend to turn right on the next street.”

“We’ll find ya!” The boy shot off like a horse from the starting gate, ducking and weaving his way effortlessly through the crowd, and I continued laying the trail I had established.

I turned right at the intersection, coming onto a busy thoroughfare, and left one blurred track before hurrying through the middle of the path, where I would leave the fewest traces. Tim caught up to me three blocks later, one of our oldest Irregulars, Charlie, in tow.

I grinned, imagining Holmes’ reaction should he find Charlie instead of Tim after the last time he had searched the city for me. This round would have a much better ending than the last.

Spotting me quickly despite the bustling crowd, the boys flanked me. The three of us nearly took up the sidewalk as I outlined my plan, never slowing my pace.

“You get to be me for a few hours,” I told them, and they grinned. I gave my cane to Charlie and my overcoat to Tim. “Holmes has until five to find me. If he finds you, he can bring back my coat or stick, otherwise bring it back to Baker Street tonight. Split up. Tim, brush against the buildings occasionally, but not often. Charlie, you have seen me when I use my cane, correct?” He nodded, and I continued. “Make sure you leave a track occasionally. If we are fortunate, he will follow one of you instead of me, and you will get to see his irritation when he discovers we tricked him.”

The boys’ grins widened, matching the mischievous one already on my own face. “Do not stop moving until five. I need you to draw him as far away as possible.”

“Yessir!” “You got it, Doctor!”

The boys split, and I last saw Tim hurrying up the street while Charlie ducked through the alley opposite. I changed streets and cut through another alley. Staying on rocky ground and away from buildings and anyone I recognized, I worked my way back to Baker Street as quickly as possible. By the time I reached the alley that ran behind the flat, it had been just over an hour, and Holmes should have reached where I had separated from the Irregulars.

A smirk crossed my face as I pictured Holmes’ reaction to discovering he had been tailing a child instead of me. The Irregulars would be able to elude him for a couple of hours, at least, and Holmes would absolutely hate that he had fallen for such a thing. By the time he caught up to one of them, the real trail would be cold, and he would be out of time. This was going to be highly entertaining for me, and it had the added benefit of occupying him for several hours.

I forced myself to focus. This would only work if I left no trail for him to follow, and I still had to reach my chosen hiding place without being seen. There was no way I would be able to walk for three hours without Holmes catching up, which was probably what he had been counting on. I scanned the alley in front of me, searching for any sign of movement.

Nothing. There was no one in sight, and my smirk grew.

Keeping a continuous scan of my surroundings, I cautiously made my way down the alley to the back of our flat. The warmer weather meant I had a chance of pulling this off, and I grabbed the drainpipe, shimmying my way up the side of the building with the occasional aid of a well-placed handhold in the brick. I may not do this as frequently as Holmes had over the years, but I knew enough to reach the roof without a problem, and I pulled myself up. Staying out of easy sight of windows and the streets below, I settled in to wait. Even if he realized I had doubled back to the flat, he would never think to look for me here.

My amusement grew with every passing minute that Holmes did not appear below me, and I kept my pocket watch in my hand to watch the time pass. While waiting, I started wondering where the boys would lead him. Charlie enjoyed trees, and it was possible Holmes would follow my cane to a young man hiding in a tree. Tim would probably stick with the crowded streets. The smaller boy enjoyed putting his size to use in passing through a large crowd, and if Holmes was following the lint on the brick rather than the stick’s tracks, Tim might not receive an irritated detective for several hours. I grinned wider at the thought.

I never got bored, perfectly content watching the flow of people pass below me, and the time passed quickly as I wondered where Holmes was and if he had discovered the trick yet. Just after five, I put my watch away and stood, stretching before carefully making my way over to a different drainpipe, one which conveniently passed my bedroom window.

It took some maneuvering, especially when my foot slipped, but within a few minutes, I had shoved open the window I had unlocked while grabbing my pocket watch and pulled myself into my room.

Shutting and latching the window behind me, I quickly made my way down the stairs, intending to be in the sitting room when Holmes arrived. The flat was quiet.

The door below opened just as I reached the landing, however, and I settled for peering over the stairs at a frustrated Holmes.

“Did you have a good walk?”

I made no attempt to hide the smirk in my voice, and Holmes froze with the door half closed. His gaze shot up to pin me to the railing, but I merely smirked and ducked into the sitting room. Slamming the door behind him, Holmes took the stairs three at a time.

“Where were you?!” he demanded as he reached the sitting room.

I looked up from the novel I had picked up, debating whether I wanted to insinuate that I had been in the sitting room the whole time.

“Not far,” I replied, smirking again. Not far, indeed. “It seems you had quite a walk, though. Which one did you follow?”

Holmes tossed me my coat with a wordless growl.

“Ah, Tim Major. I imagine Charlie will be by later, then. Did Timothy enjoy being caught?”

“His grin was wider than yours is now,” was Holmes’ irritated reply. “Where were you?”

“Baker Street, of course. You know I do not enjoy walking very far in the crowd.”

Holmes pondered that for a moment before his expression cleared, and my grin widened at the reply.

“You circled around back here, did you not?”

“Close. Think higher.”

“Higher? Then—” Holmes’ eyes widened. “The drainpipe. You were on the roof!”

My grin turned into a full laugh at Holmes’ scowl, and I set down my book. “I was back _on_ the flat within an hour after you left. How far did Tim lead you before you caught up?”

He scowled at me again as he took his seat. “I caught him crossing the street on the other side of Hyde Park.”

That was near my old practice, at least an hour’s quick walk from Baker Street. I would have to congratulate Tim the next time I saw him.

I made no attempt to kill the grin splitting my face, and Holmes tried to hold his scowl. He was merely irritated that I had won. I knew that, but I could not resist a comment when he refused to acknowledge that he had enjoyed it.

“You have not been bored for nearly four hours,” I informed him.

The scowl finally faded, and he quirked a grin at me, mutely acknowledging the point.

“Where are we going for supper?” I asked, leaning back in my chair, my grin still on my face. Holmes was not the only one that had enjoyed the last several hours.

He raised an eyebrow at me. “I thought that was your choice, since you won.”

I shrugged. “We like the same places,” I told him. “If you are buying, I can let you choose. I will just be glad to enjoy the nice weather while it lasts.”

He pulled a face at me, knowing that that was a dig at the first half of the day that he had refused to leave the sitting room, but his only reply was, “Shall we try that new one down on the Strand?”

I agreed but could not resist one further question. “So, does this mean the Irregulars _are_ better than you?”

His only answer was a scowl.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is always greatly appreciated :)


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